You Will Never Be Fulfilled

In light of recent tragic events and those that occurred throughout the course of the year, I thought this to be a good time to stop and reflect on what I’ve learned and re-enforced over the past twelve months.  Assuming you read this post, I would love for you to share some of what you’ve learned this year.  We’re all teachers if we choose to be, some of course more heroic for obvious reasons.

Live in the now
While it’s nice to reflect on the past and it’s important to plan for the future, I try not to live in either place (not for long at least). Now more than ever, I understand the senselessness and potential danger of wasting precious time and energy on things over which I have zero control. It is an ongoing challenge to learn to love the now, to be in the moment and to have a greater level of realization, awareness and gratitude for what I have and where I am in this very moment. Some people are so stressed about, and preoccupied with, the future – and angry and bitter about the past – that they never allow themselves to appreciate or enjoy the now.

Things have the meaning you give them

It’s true; we create our own reality. My reality being what happens in that place between my ears or turban. While the good, bad and ugly will continue to happen to me and around me, I will continue to choose how I interpret, how I process and how I react to the various situations, circumstances, happenings and events of my world (My daughter does this far more eloquently on her blog – cheap plug: www.OurWorldMyViews.com and mind you, she is only 10). For the most part hard or easy, problem or opportunity, catastrophe or challenge, major drama or life-changing lesson is about how we as a society interpret the events of our world (the meaning we give them) and our subsequent choices and behavior.

We’re all flawed… and that’s okay
Perfection obsession is destructive, painful and largely commercially driven. But then perhaps I say that because I’m so flawed (ask my wife).  While we are always asking questions, learning new things, setting goals and exploring our potential, we should be intensely aware of our overall level of dysfunction. It is called being human. I know how many of you think I am perfect – cough cough, so I’m sorry to disappoint. Aiming for improvement is healthy. Aiming for perfection is destructive because for one it’s unachievable and two, it leads to frustration, desperation and poor(er) self-esteem. The sooner we stop idolizing the affluent, the surgically enhanced and the famous, the better. Now before you inundate me with hate mail… no, not all surgically-enhanced, rich, famous people are miserable. But then, I don’t really know. And yes, it’s possible to be simultaneously flawed and outwardly happy and content. That, I do know.

Life is to be treasured
I know we shouldn’t need to re-learn this lesson but the tragic shooting that just happened at Sandy Hook Elementary few days ago gives you no option but to re-learn it once again. When we step away from the day-to-day distractions, minor problems and fluff, we have so much to celebrate, yet the good stuff (life, health, family, friends) so often gets over-looked, if not, forgotten completely. Reach out and hug someone today already will ya!

Accept people, places, things, and life as a whole
When you accept yourself, other people, things, places and situations as they are—not as you’d wish them to be—life is much easier. It’s only when you’re trying to change people or situations that tend to upset us. This year, I found that once I stopped trying to change others, they felt free to be themselves around me, and I could see the beauty in their being. When I accepted life as it is, I stop resisting and use my energies on those things that actually benefit from my input. So much more gratifying!

So there it is: an “Instagram” of what life has taught me in 2012. I would love to hear some of the lessons you’ll take away from 2012. Let’s inspire, uplift and encourage.

Type away, “What I have learned in 2012 is……..”

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Ricky Ahuja

A serial entrepreneur, Ricky Ahuja has been known and well respected for his strong acumen as an online marketer and social media expert. . His previous agency was ranked in the Top 10 on 2012 list of the “Top 10 Networks” and was most recently nominated as a Top 20 Ad Network on Blue Book survey by Revenue Performance. He is now the Director at Nutryst and working closely with John Crestani and Steve Lowry to build the leading Nutra only network.

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  1. Agreed real treasured in life to accept everyone as they are. And honestly you bit encouraged me to planned my 2013 with some positive vibes 🙂

    Glade with Tarina blog, i guess youngest blogger i came across!

    1. Hey Rick,

      I am totally agree with Sam. This is the time to accept our reality and create our way to whatever we want to get. 2013 will be better because 2012, in my case, was not good at all.

      Indeed life is to be treasured because there is only one moment, and this is this moment and no one assures us they’ll be other.

      Best wishes.

  2. “This year, I found that once I stopped trying to change others, they felt free to be themselves around me, and I could see the beauty in their being.”

    The only person you can change is yourself, and when you do that you force others to change how the deal with you.

    If you want to read a great book that helped me learn this very hard lesson, read BrainTricks . (and no this isn’t an affiliate link).

    Thank you Ricky for a great perspective and helping us to all “center” what is really important in our lives. For we are not measured by how much we loved, as by how much we are loved. And that can only come from accepting people for who they are and giving unselfishly to them with all your heart. Agape.

  3. I am so glad you shared this with us Ricky. I specifically like what you said about not letting your mind linger to long in the past nor the future. But learning to operate in the present. It is so challenging to do but I think so rewarding in the end. Thanks for an insightful article!

    1. Hey Brittany, you are more than welcome. This has been a trying year for all of us and have no doubt we can continue to learn from each others trials and tribulations. Have a great holiday season and please wish the team at Cake from me. You guys truly rock!

  4. Great article Ricky. Well said. I’m thankful for people like you who remind us to be more humble. And most of all, making sure to spend time with those that will be with you always no matter what you have, because they only love the person you are. Hopefully ASW will have a more appreciative crowd given the lessons recently taught to us through SuperStorm Sandy and the tragic SHES lives lost.

    1. Thank you Peter – not to mention the shooting at the theater in Colorado as well as the Wisconsin shooting at the Sikh temple. We should all count our collective blessings and reflect on our family and friends at ASW. Oh and btw – the left side of the turban is still up for bids for exclusive sponsorship. 😉

  5. This is a great post that really got me thinking about my life. Especially now that the year is coming to an end,I can’t help but wonder if the decisions I made were right.

  6. Jeremy – glad you liked the article! All the decisions we made/make are all done for a reason. Lot of times that may not be so apparent – but trust me, there is a higher force at work here.

  7. What I learned in 2012 is…things doesn’t always happen the way you plan it. I experienced a lot of failures this year, but the good thing there is that every time I fall, I come out better.

  8. Great article.

    2012 brought a lot of great things not only to me but to my family as well. Forgiveness reigns, love prevails and blessing overflows. Looking forward to a much greater 2013.

  9. I guess Life is much easier when you think about it as a person who loves to live. You are right, we create our own reality and live in it. That’s why each of us can be counted as an individual. Life is not about things, life is about LIFE!

  10. People these days always want and want and . . . One comment posted, “not letting your mind linger to long in the past.” Sometimes (in my case I think), is that the past is what molds your present and future!
    I am the type of person because of what happened in the past – AND it will most certainty affect me in the future!
    As well, we will never be fulfilled, we will always want more and bigger things in life! As a society, we have fallen to, ” more and more!” Look at the size of the restaurant drive-thru items – bigger and fatter!

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